From the Rabbi

Greeting Shabbat in White and Learning the Secrets of God

In the 16th century, the rabbis of Safad and their followers welcomed Shabbat dressed in white.  As the sun went down, these rabbis and their congregations would go out into the fields singing “Come, my friend, let us go together and meet the Sabbath bride.”

We still sing Lecha Dodi at our own services and every summer we choose one service for wearing white. That Shabbat service is nearly upon us  —  tomorrow night in fact.  We’ll dress like angels and hear a story in which we will discover how to learn the secrets of God.

Please join us for a sweet summer Shabbat!

Time: 7 pm
Location: McGill Baptist Church, Concord
Date: July 13, 2012

 

The Purpose of a Bar or Bat Mitzvah

Just about a week ago, one of our parents asked me to explain the purpose of a bar or bat mitzvah. Her email came at an interesting time. Just days earlier, I had posted an entry on my blog, Adrenaline Drash, about that very question. Here’s the link to that piece, entitled: “Teaching is Believing.”

http://adrenalinedrash.com/

At game night, the parent told me that my email was helpful – so helpful that she thought I should send it to all of you. So here it is: A short answer to the question: What is the purpose of a bar or bat mitzvah?

Let me begin with a true story.

Last night, Bryston Spivock and I spent an hour on his bar mitzvah study of a small community of Chinese Jews in Kaifeng. That community was approached in the 17th century, and later, by Christian missionaries and Jesuits who were very interested in acquiring their Torah scrolls. The Jews held out in the 17th century. But in the mid-1800’s, the community sold their scrolls.

I asked Bryston: What does the Torah mean to him? Why does he value, even venerate an object he can’t read and wouldn’t understand when it is read aloud? Why does the thought of losing this object upset him? Then we asked why this little Chinese Jewish community could hold on to their scrolls in 1660 but not two hundred years later.

How did they survive with so little? What did the Torah mean to them? What is Torah in the first place? B’nai mitzvah study is about taking years of study the children have behind them and integrating them in an in-depth learning experience with their rabbi for this reason: To look at big questions around who they are and what their Jewish identity means to them.

What is the nature of God? What does it mean to be Jewish? Why do we pray and to what purpose? How do we work with challenging texts in prayer services? Why do we revere something the vast majority of us can’t read and don’t know the contents of (even in translation)? What is community? What are Jewish values and ethics?

Each young person does this kind of work with me for six to nine months no matter which track they choose (see b’nai mitzvah guidelines or my blog for a refresher on the choices available). It’s wonderfully intense and close and, in my experience, gives each child an experience with their rabbi that they will not forget — one I don’t, either. We ask the big questions, we study what it means when we say we are living Jewishly (a very individual thing, too!). We learn who we are.

I am thankful for the fact that that goes for them AND for me (see my blog entry).

With many blessings,

Rabbi Barbara

Dear TOO members: All of this work is part and parcel of adult bar and bat mitzvah training, too.  Stay tuned for an awesome experience this next year when our first class of adult women will hold their bat mitzvah ceremony!

The Blanket Went to Ruth at Our Annual Meeting and a New Lecha Dodi this Friday

Dear Temple Or Olam members,

Our Annual Meeting was wonderfully joyous.  We honored congregants, as planned, talked about our goals for the next year and the many accomplishments of the last.  We reveled in the back-and-forth joking and the laughter.  Our business was accomplished quickly — our time together was treated as the precious thing it was.  Then, we ate.  🙂

It has been a good year — filled with a sweet and growing sense of community, a culture of compassion and understanding and delight.

I discovered later that the raffle had been rigged.  Apparently, just about everyone had put their ticket in the cup standing before the hand-crocheted blanket Angela Hodges had made for some lucky congregant.  The cups before other raflle items stood mostly empty.  Why?  Those attending had worked it out with one another: Whoever won the blanket would donate it to Ruth Kingberg.

Everyone was complicit in an act of thoughtful generosity.

The blanket is now on Ruth’s bed and she and Arthur have let me know — repeatedly — how touched they were to receive it.  Ruth wraps herself up in that blanket for naps and rest times and marvels at the workmanship.

I marvel at the way this congregation keeps coming together in such lovingkindness.   For those of you who missed the get-together and the raffle and the fun and the food, I hope to see you at this Friday’s service where you will be treated to a new and bubbly musical rendition of Lecha Dodi…

Many blessings to all,

Rabbi Barbara

The Rabbi Says… Watch T.V.! (?)

Most of you know that I almost never turn on the tube.  But I will this week.  Why?  Because of Jason Roberts, one of the nicest and most talented musicians I know.

Some of you may remember the amazing way Jason riffed on Adon Olam at his younger brother Benjamin’s bar mitzvah.  Catch this: Jason is going on tour with Norah Jones, singer songwriter and winner of a goodly number of Grammy awards.

Jason will be on David Letterman this Wednesday night and on Good Morning America on Thursday morning.  That’s why the rabbi is suggesting you turn on your televisions.  🙂

By the by, Benjamin has also given us reason to kvell (anyone surprised?): He was recently nominated for the National Honor Society!

We have so many reasons to be proud, don’t we?

Blessings,

Rabbi Barbara

By the By — Violins for Hope Exhibit is Free of Charge

I forgot to mention that little fact in my previous post.  The exhibit costs us nothing but our time and it is certainly worth that!

Please consider joining us for the Violins of Hope exhibit on April 22.  We’ll meet at 2 pm at UNC-Charlotte’s Center City Building (320 E. 9th Street).  It offers a great opportunity for fellowship, educational experience and sporting our  Temple Or Olam T-shirts…. (and if you don’t have one, feel free to ask Robbin Smith, our treasurer how to acquire one gorgeously Carolina blue Temple T-shirt).  🙂

Rabbi Barbara

Visiting the Violins of Hope Exhibit — As a Congregation

Dear All,

I wrote the thesis for my first master’s degree on the Holocaust.  I have been teaching courses on the Holocaust and the history of European antisemitism for almost thirty years.  I was recently privileged to be a part of the activities around the Violins of Hope exhibit by giving the opening lecture at the UNC-Charlotte exhibit “Spots of Light: To Be a Woman in the Holocaust.”

You all know that remembering, honoring, and acknowledging this history is very important to me.  We are lucky to have the chance to remember merely by being together because our own congregation is blessed by the presence of Holocaust survivors Arthur and Ruth Kingberg.

I would very much like you all to invite you all to join with me in visiting the exhibit Violins of Hope at UNC-Charlotte Center City Building Gallery on April 22.  The exhibit includes 18 violins that tell stories of the Holocaust – its victims and survivors.  We may be making this trip as part of an interfaith experience with members of Davidson College Presbyterian Church.

We will meet at the gallery at 2 pm April 22.  Please RSVP to Rabbi.Thiede@or-olam.org by April 18 if you would like to be a part of this amazing trip.  Alan Coffman, one of our own, may be working as a docent there that very day!

Chag sameach to all,

Rabbi Barbara

Time: 2 pm
Date: April 22, 2012
Location: UNC-Charlotte Center City Building Gallery, 320 E. 9th Street

So Good and So True

Those who were there know we had a gorgeously warm and wonderful seder.  We acknowledged our hopes and our dreams, we shredded what needs to be left behind and we shared what we were taking on our journey.  We made it through a gorgeous, drifting, waving Sea of Reeds and we entered a sanctuary in the very spirit of fun.

There were gags and laughs and even near-miracles.  We got bugged, all right, and hail fell too.  There was sudden darkness and, fortunately, great light.

I want to thank all who helped make this year’s seder the extraordinary experience it was: To our cooking team, Judah Malin, Bill Spivock, Angela Hodges, Jessica Waldman, and Alan Coffman — our heartfelt thanks!  Thanks to Ruth Kingberg and all other menu contributors.

Thanks also go to Yvette Spivock, Angela Hodges, Ginger Jensen, Robbin Smith, Janet Sternbach, Sabrina Sternbach, Mark Sternbach, Steve Smith, Linda Sands and her wonderful family (Dan and Thea) as well as the Jacobsons, Gordons and Greenwalds for all their hard work decorating, setting up and cleaning up.

The tables and gag items were awesome and the Sea of Reeds absolutely unforgettable!

Thanks also to Richard Jacobson and Angela Hodges for the adorable delivery of this year’s shtick on the story and finally, thanks to all who came, sang, participated, discussed, shared, and helped us have our very best seder ever!

Many blessings and much joy to all.

Rabbi Barbara

A Pesach-O-Gram from Rabbi Barbara

Let’s set some records straight.  Exodus 13:3 simply tells the Israelites that they may not eat chamatz  during  Pesach (Passover). Chametz  is leaven made from five grains known at the time: chitim (wheat), seorim (barley), kusmin (rice wheat), shibolet shual (millet, oats, or two-rowed barley), and shifon (spelt wheat or oat)

Torah tells us that Jews should not be eating chametz.  That’s wheat, barley, rye, oats and spelt if they have been sitting in water for more than 18 minutes.  Water exposure for longer than 18 minutes will result in leavening.  Some grains are processed using water.  If you want to eat oatmeal for breakfast, look for the designation “kosher for Pesach” or “kasher l’pesach” and you should be fine.

But what about kasha or quinoa or rice?  What about corn, peas, lentils, and beans?

These items are classed as kitniyot which all Jews can have in the house during the hag (festival) but which Ashkenazi Jews do not eat.

Why?  European rabbis may have ruled against eating kitniyot because they are often made into edible items that look like chametz (e.g. cornbread).  Another explanation: These items were stored in the same sacks as five grains and rabbis were afraid the one would be contaminated by chametz from the other.  And finally, the rabbis worried that if farmers alternated kityinot crops with forbidden chametz grains the two could get mixed together.

But in recent decades, rabbis have questioned Ashkenazi practice in this regard.  In 1988, Rabbi David Golinkin noted that the many additional prohibitions observed by Ashkenazim were not that old in the grand scheme of Jewish history.  Before the 13th century the Jews of Europe appear to have had no compunction whatsoever about eating kityinot during Pesach.  Sephardi and Mizrachi Jews never joined their Ashkenazi brethren in expanding the list of prohibited foods. 

Rabbi Golinken noted that the prohibitions detracted from the joy of the holiday by limiting the number of permitted foods.  He added that prohibitions against eating kityinot  caused exorbitant price rises, that they emphasized the insignificant at the expense of paying attention to the significant (chametz), and that they caused unnecessary divisions between Israel’s different ethnic groups.

Does it make sense to prohibit food items that were entirely unknown in Torah times? Can we imagine the Ancient Israelites worrying about whether they could eat soybeans and sweetcorn?  These items were unknown to the medieval authorities some Ashkenazi rabbis claim to be following when they proscribe them from our Pesach diet.

It’s really this simple: Why insist on meaningless restrictions when Torah permits us to eat kityinot?

We don’t.

So if you see kasha or soy or rice at Temple Or Olam’s Passover seder, please be aware that our congregation cares about observing the festival as Torah asks us to.  Joyfully.  Sanely.  Appropriately.

What you won’t see is chametz, because that is what Torah prohibits.  No more.  No less.

Enjoy the seder!

Our Community Passover Seder – Making it Real

It is about freedom.  How do we extract ourselves from narrow spaces where our souls are confined, our hearts hurt?


Each year, we find that there are struggles before us, times and places where we feel tense and strained.  We toil far too long each day.  Our resources don’t cover our needs.  We feel our efforts go unappreciated.


We face the illness of a beloved friend or family member.  There’s a conflict brewing we’d rather avoid.  We fear speaking out, we fear holding our frustrations in.  We struggle with our own patterns, our own mistakes, our own unrealized hopes and dreams.


But at Passover, we have an opportunity to remember the long road to freedom our ancestors took.  Their process can teach us about ours: Freedom is a prize we learn to earn.  We ourselves create the freedom we long for.


This year, we will start our seder by singing through the hallways around the sanctuary.  We will find the Sea of Reeds and break through to freedom.  On the other side, instruments and music and joy.  Avadim Hayinu – We were slaves but now we are free!


Before our seder begins, we will gather at long tables in groups to write down all those many things constraining us.  We will post them on the walls around us.  These are our own plagues.  When we name them, we can free ourselves from them.


We will eat the food our own congregation has prepared.  We will do some journaling in our Books of Life.  Our children will lead the singing.  We will celebrate our freedom and our joy. 


Join us, and help us make our stories (and yours) real.


Our Passover seder begins at 5:30, April 7 at McGill Baptist Church in Concord.  If you are interested in attending, please RSVP to info@or-olam.org

Shabbat-O-Gram: A Little Torah, A Lot of Learning – From Rabbi Barbara

What do we remember of religious school?  Memorizing Hebrew letters?  Learning the melody to particular prayers?  Creating a Rorschach map of Israel, perhaps?

One of the things our Religious School aims to do is to familiarize our children with Torah stories.  We want our children to connect with this lovely fact: Any story, any verse in our tradition can give rise to innumerable and wholly relevant questions.

Our Torah and the midrash – the rich rabbinic commentary it has generated – is a treasure worth unpacking.  Our ancestors’ enigmatic silences or their passionate appeals, their struggles and their troubles can speak to our children – and to us.

Take this midrash: As Moses approached his wayward people with the Ten Commandments, a people wildly celebrating the creation of the Golden Calf, the letters on the tablets he carried flew off the stone.  The tablets became too heavy to hold.  No wonder he threw them from his arms; no wonder they splintered into pieces.

What happens when humanity violates the most essential principles, the most foundational elements of creating a just society?  Even our children can and have imagined consequences.  We adults see them writ large each day in the news – from the murder of families to the genocide of peoples.

Our Torah tells us that our people forgot their commitment to build a just society.  They forgot their vow to God at Sinai.  The stones became too heavy to carry because Moses bore the burden of human arrogance.

Or perhaps he carried their fear?  They stand vulnerable in the wilderness.  Where is God?  Where is their leader?  What have they committed to?  Another midrash tells us that Moses broke the tablet to safeguard the people he loved.  He didn’t want them to be held responsible for what they hadn’t yet received.  If they hadn’t received the law, they could not be said to have violated it.  Moses understood the Israelites’ anxiety.  What had they ever known but slavery?  How could they understand the responsibilities of freedom?

The rabbis even imagine Moses challenging God.  In this commentary, Moses asks: “Do you not remember that Israel learned idolatry in the land of idolaters?  Who put them there but You?!”

Torah: a rich and sweet and challenging source for the questions humanity has always faced, for the questions we ourselves face.  Do we know what it is to forget a promise?  Do we know what it is to be lost in a wilderness in which our fear makes us unsteady, our decisions imbalanced and wrongheaded?

Ask the children what they are learning from their stories.  Consider taking a moment to read a little Torah on Shabbat.  Torah speaks to the human condition in any time.  It helps us learn who we are and who we hope to be.